Week One or André versus the Ants

I will try and record my impressions and experiences during this year abroad. For the teachers (and control freaks and sisters) who read this: it is a free flowing thought process and first draft.  No commenting on grammar, style or voice allowed!  You know who you are! (I have yet to learn how to edit a blog).

And so we arrived safe and sound.  First stop:  Swizzle Inn!  Swizzle is one of Bermuda's national drinks, the other being a Dark and Stormy.  Swizzle can be made with a variety of fruit juices and dark rum, but I actually prefer the mix.  We are staying at The Brae, built in the 1700s.  All houses seem to have a name here, only recently acquiring street numbers.  It makes me think what the name of our house in White Rock would be?  Dust Bunny Inn?  Watering Hole?  But I digress.  We are house-sitting for Diana Hyde who spends most of her time in Maryland.  Her daughter, Anne, lives on an adjacent property and has been extremely  hospitable.  We live downstairs primarily and will share a kitchen with Diana when she is on the Island.  The reality is that we spend most of our time on the patio, deck, lanai, as the weather is more than conducive to being outdoors.  So far it has been very hot, very humid and very wonderful!

Elbow Beach is a 10 minute walk away.  We have been in the water at least twice everyday.  In the Summer months it is almost necessary to cool off.  Unfortunately, my plans for swimming every day and learning to dive immediately have been put on hold.  I have perforated my eardrum after a severe infection and it may take some time to heal.  So far the sight seeing has included a trip to the hospital!How banal to get Swimmer's ear and have it deteriorate like this--the last time I injured myself in Bermuda, at least it was doing something exciting like body-surfing.  I will need a better story for my poor, pathetic, deaf and painful ear.

House-sitting seems to be the way of the Island.  Apparently there is property crime here and since Bermudians are great travellers, they prefer their house to be lived in, rather than standing empty.  Even though we have a permanent house sit at the Brae, we are at the moment house-sitting for friends of Janice for the next 3 weeks.  This house, Surf Song, is the antithesis of The Brae--new, modern, with a kitchen out of  House and Home. The Brae  would be better featured in Historical Homes. The house is right on  the ocean, on South Shore, where all the beaches are located.  Just a short walk either to the right or left brings us to a small sandy beach.  At the moment there is a weak Tropical Storm--Colin-- so swimming is not a good idea.

We arrived just prior to Cup Match--a 2 day holiday for a cricket 'grudge match' between the opposite
ends of the Island, Somerset and St. George's.  The actual holidays have other, more civically responsible reasons, but really it is a reason for some to travel and some to party!  Cup Match  is really about playing Crown and Anchor.  They give you money to play with and provide you with free Swizzle as long as you play.  It's almost as if they believe the odds are favour of the House...  It rained a warm, tropical downpour while we were there.  So hard we could have showered. 

Rain is appreciated here as it is the only source of fresh water.  All the roofs are designed so that rain run-off collects in a tank.  Since prior to our arrival there had been a drought, everyone was happy about the 'tank rain', as it's called.  When the tank gets low or empty, residents can either order water from a truck or pay a monthly fee to be hooked up to a water line that is used only in times of drought.  We have a water line at The Brae, but there is also an extra tank, so there should be no problem for us.  Having said that, there are small adjustments to daily life when  water is precious.  No long showers, of course; water off while shaving; and 'If it's yellow let it mellow, if it's brown, flush it down' is the motto.

The most striking thing we've noticed in the differences in daily life is how close to nature we live--or, perhaps, how far removed from it we are at home.  Although we are not chopping our own wood, or hunting our food, we are battling the elements to a degree.We have been told it is a losing battle.  Ants are pervasive.  tiny, ubiquitous, persistent.  If any food whatsoever is left out, the ants will find it.  They get into every home--regardless of the level of cleanliness or construction.  They will find a point of entry and march, almost single file, along a specific route to the food source, and march out along the same route. The only thing to do is clean up, wipe up all the time.  Not a bad thing, I suppose!

There are some remedies that we have tried.  Insecticides, of course, but that has its limitations--the least of which is poisoning ourselves.  There are various commercial products, but the most interesting is chalk.  We have heard that ants will not cross a chalk line.  At a dinner party, the theory was tested by drawing a line of chalk across the ant parade.  Sure enough, they began to get confused and disperse.  In a cruel move, a maze was drawn and we watched them get confused and angry!  Have I mentioned that we don't have a TV set up yet?  Bermuda entertainment!!! André has taken it upon himself to do battle.  This occurred after I left a dish of ice cream on the counter one night.  André versus the Ants--literary reference #1.

So far we have only seen one cockroach.  When insecticide was ineffective, I put a leash on it and called it 'Archie'--literary reference #2.  We've since been told we should get a Bible.  I thought perhaps this was in reference to the coming end of the world and the meek cockroaches who may inherit it.  But no.  It seems that dropping something the size and weight of the Bible from a height of abut 4 feet is the only sure way to kill them.